The Ugly Truth

I suppose I really can't continue any further without showing you the ugly truth.  Somehow I manage to not notice it everyday.  I guess you can call it selective vision.  But seeing what the camera sees really sucks.

I have a lovely house.... underneath it all.  All the piles of crap, and dishes and clothes and toys and mail and everything else I try to mentally block out.  But the layers are coming off and I am going to do it right so I can keep it manageable.  So we can live like everyone else lives.

So there it is.  That's how my kitchen looks today, right now in fact.  I am sitting on the computer while I have a house that looks like this.  I love to cook.  Been told I am an excellent cook in fact.  But, I haven't cooked anything in a while.  How can I?  There's no room to create.  I really miss working in the kitchen.  Even when I do cook now, I don't enjoy it because of the chaos right on the other side of the counter.

Ready for more?  I'm not sure I am... but if I'm going to commit, I guess I better be willing to jump in with both feet.

Ugh.  This would be a great piece of furniture I had Messy Dad make for me a few years ago.  How do I show him my appreciation?  Frankly I don't.  It's now another surface covered in crap... and in this case, surrounded in crap.  Hey, look!  I see a vacuum cleaner.. yeah, it's probably been sitting in that exact same spot for 2 weeks.

Hard to imagine how we lose things the moment we set them down... yeah, I know, that's laughable... It's painfully obvious to see why we can never find anything.  PAINFULLY.

Is it Jan 1, 11 yet?  Because I'm ready.  I'm really ready.

Until next time,
Messy Mom

How Did I Let This Happen?

How did I let it happen? Well it wasn't a conscience decision, I can tell you that much. Much like excess weight, it slowly crept up on me. I wasn't alone in my culpability. I had plenty of company.. I had depression, anxiety issues, a new found friend of procrastination and plenty of arthritis to throw in the mix. Misery loves company, right? I had plenty of comapny, PLENTY.

First it was the excuses.. I'm too busy to straighten up right now... That pile belongs to my husband.... As soon as I'm done watching this show.... I'll make too much noise and wake up the baby... My knee hurts too much.... I could go on, really, I could. Truth be told, I flat out didn't want to. Not sure if it was the depression or laziness, most likely it was a lot of both. But there was always a reason... and I always had an excuse to give  Heck, you want my excuse right now?  It's because I'm busy blogging and the girls are watching a movie.  Besides, I'd eventually get to it, someday.  Someday never comes.

Someday is finally here and it has a date... 1/1/11. That's my D-Day. My home has been a reflection of my inner self for a long time. But I no longer want to feel the way it looks. It's time to break my way free.

You might be wondering what I do when people come over... well, they don't. I don't have people over. I always have a last minute excuse as to why I have to cancel or change the venue. If I don't, there's a darn good reason why the bedroom doors are closed... the messes were moved. My biggest fear?.. .an unexpected guest. AAAAHHH!

No one should live like this. No One. Yet, I'm forcing my family to live this way. I'm all about teaching my children to be responsible and accountable. It's about damn time I am accountable for my home.It's time to conquer this house and be queen of my home instead of inmate #4.

Next on my agenda... figure out what I need to get started.... and own up to my mess and post some pictures.  Ugh.

Until next time,
Messy Mom

So This Is How It All Begins?

I guess this is where I start... an idea. No, a plan. I always say, next year will be different. Is it? In a word, no. But, I've had enough. I want my life back and I want to be serious about it. So I figure if I put it all out there, show the ugly truth, then I will hopefully stick with it.

Here's my plan... In 2011, I am going to organize my entire house. Sure, some of you out there think that's easy enough... you haven't seen my house. I know what an organized house looks like. I used to have one. Before I had a husband, 2 kids, 2 cats, a dog and a rabbit. Now? Now I have something that resembled (far too closely) something you would see on a TLC show.

Here's how I'm going to do it. Each month I am going to pick a room. I'm going to strip it down, get rid of all the crap that we don't need or use and then I'm going to put it all together again... on a budget. I promise to keep it cheap. Why? Because I'm too cheap to spend a ton of money. But I will do what's necessary and get the job done. Heck, I think I'll even post how much money I spent on each room to get everything together. I'm going to be organized, right? Guess I can no longer pitch those receipts the moment I walk out the door.

When... it all starts January 1. I'm going to start with the Master Bath and Master Closet.  I don't want to jump in on a project that is going to be too difficult to handle or too cumbersome that I just give up before it ever even starts.  I want to be realistic.  I figure if I start off small, I can start creating positive habits,  start forming ideas for other areas of the house and really get the ball moving in the right direction.

Well, here we go! Guess I better start shopping for a label maker on the cheap!